delight: (up the ladder)
primum non nocere sans documentum ([personal profile] delight) wrote2016-12-31 08:43 pm
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2016 year in review.

As I said last year, and this is a quote: This is a hodgepodge of different people's variations on this meme, now, so I'm not even sure where 100% of the questions are sourced at this point.

I said last year that 2015 was the worst year of my life, and the thing is, despite how awful 2016 was, I'm pretty sure that's still true? 2016 had a lot of shitty culmination of awful things that were essentially sourced from 2015 and the end of 2016. There was a lot of bad in 2015 that didn't continue.

My to-do list is a mile long but I don't feel good so I'm just going to do this instead.

And, anyway, here's 2016.

1. What did you do in 2015 that you'd never done before?
• Have one of my parents die. I've had deaths of people I love happen before, but I have never had anything to this extent. Not ever. I don't think I loved anyone in the world more than my father, and I don't think I ever will. My mother and my dog come a very close second, my partner in a tight third, but he kept me alive and kept me going in ways no one else can even approximate.

• Attended graduate school, something I can also, in many ways, credit to my dad, but I'm not dwelling on the sad here.

• Worked at a full-time job (WHILE BEING A FULL TIME STUDENT, WHICH I AM STILL DOING, WHICH BY THE WAY IS A TERRIBLE LIFE CHOICE) with benefits where I am not miserable and hate what I'm doing every second of every day.

2. What goals do you have for 2017?
Before I answer this, let's look at what my goals were on last year's meme, where I'm currently copying the questions from.
1. Employment – Success! I have had this job since May and only nearly got fired once.
2. Grad school admission – Success! Doing that too.
3. Our own apartment – Decided to stay in the house until Mom sells it so she isn't alone and the three of us are able to work together on things, so this has been tabled.
4. Financial stability – Sort of success? This is only a thing because we don't have to pay rent or utilities right now.
So really I did pretty well on those goals, the "big" ones. This year ... I don't know. I'd like to keep my job and maintain a GPA that's pretty good? Have successful fieldwork? I'm also supposed to be publishing a book in April, but I don't even have the first draft done. Unfortunately I also have a contract so I really need to make it happen somehow.

I try not to look forward too much with big goals because I can never predict where life might take me, and all of my tiny ones are rather up in the air at the moment.

3. How did you spend New Year 2016?
What I said last year was "In a hospital room at Memorial Sloan Kettering, at my father's bedside" and that's essentially true here too, though by the time midnight rolled over I was passed out back at the house. Mom was still at Dad's bedside in the hospital.

4. How will you spend it for 2017?
I seem to be sitting here doing this meme. Then I'm going to wash my hair, most likely.

5. How much traveling did you do in 2016?
Essentially zilch except for one wonderful weekend with friends in DC in May.

6. What would you like to have in 2017 that you lacked in 2016?
Career and academic stability, rather than constant nerves about my status. To not feel like I'm constantly wrung out and exhausted. A dog, but I don't think this one is happening. :(

7. What date from 2015 will remain etched upon your memory and why?
August 28th. My father's 66th birthday. He died. August 30th, too, for the funeral (making it the next morning didn't work out because of rabbinical availability, so it was two days instead).

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Getting Job or getting into SPH.

9. What was your biggest learning experience?
I hate how 'my dad died' is essentially the answer to everything, but ... my dad died and this taught me an absurd number of things, the current one that is still being rammed home being that probate court sucks, so be sure to sign everything related to life insurance in triplicate so your family isn't stuck doing what my family is stuck doing now. (I will explain this at a later date if anyone's actually curious; my super-tiredness is not conducive to writing it out in a post that is mainly for myself, at the moment.)

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
Like previous years, best just leave this one at 'yes' or the answer's going to get unwieldy.

11. What was the best thing you got, bought or pilfered?
My Alex and Ani collection got way bigger! I have a hat from Goorin Bros, which is basically a life goal, and someday I might get a second one! These are vain answers, they are both things you wear. The best thing I have is my father's favorite sweater, which I'm currently wearing, but only for sentimental reasons. It's definitely either the bracelets, the hat or something hugely monumental that is totally slipping my mind for reasons of tiredness.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
My mother, and my bosses.

13. What's your most embarrassing moment of 2016?
I still just really don't remember. I think I always block out the answer to this question. Things plague at me for 3 billion years and then as soon as I get asked about them, bam, gone.

14. Where did most of your money go?
The MTA, I'm sure. They get $359 a month out of me, which is the largest lump sum I'm required to give anyone. The answer only isn't 'textbooks' because I'm doing the terrifying "100% running on financial aid" thing. It's also possible that the answer is actually taxes? But I don't look. So I'm pretty sure it's the MTA.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Ha, last year I said Shannon visiting and that was the answer again this year too. Starting school. Starting job. Not sucking at job. Being dragged by Successful Author Friend into writing her extended universe/Kindle World, even though I now have this book contract where I need to have a draft done in like a month and a half ... Still excited, just a bit scary!

16. What song will always remind you of 2016?
"Fresh" by Artist vs. Poet because it played all the time. Spotify backs this up, it's my top track of 2016. I'm not sure why it ended up playing all the time, but there you have it.

17. Did you start any new hobbies?
What is time?

I mean, to be honest, I joined a new MUSH but that's about it. And technically, I don't have time for it.

18. What do you wish you'd done more of?
Things that weren't exhausting and terrible. I really need to do these memes when I feel more able to expand upon answers, but that's ... really it. Enjoyable writing that's actually fun and interacting with others.

19. What do you wish you'd done less of?
Waiting.

20. How did you spend Christmas?
I don't celebrate it; I was working. I was at work. I was the only one who was enjoying being at work.

21. Did you fall in love or stay in love in 2016?
Stayed just about where I was. Am.

22. Discover any new restaurants?
Probably. Places by work. Several of them. Still too exhausted/depression-brained to remember much of anything except Hill Country. Which I learned about for a sad reason -- favorite co-worker's "leaving New York forever" party -- but I look forward to returning to.

23. What were you watching on TV in 2016?
Er, pretty much nothing. Definitely nothing I hadn't seen before.

24. Any TV you've given up on?
I basically gave up on TV, because what is time? I'm usually only home long enough to go to bed.

25. Movie experiences of 2016 you'd like to remember?
Concussion was great! That would be the only new movie I saw in the past year and the only time I stepped foot into a movie theatre, so it was January. Haven't seen a new movie or been to a theatre since January of 2016.

26. What was your greatest musical discovery?
Could not possibly narrow it down, I never can. This is another question I should take out; I'm also starting to wonder why I'm trying to do this, since my brain is obviously too depressed to really spit out coherent answers?

27. Any books to talk about?
FALLEN EMPIRE. Fallen Empire. Guess which extended universe I'm writing a novel in? (Also did a lot of Ken McClure rereading.)

28. New games?
If you count First Pass Pern as a game.

29. What was your favourite film of this year?
... Concussion, just like I said it would be on the previous meme. However, it technically came out in 2015 and so I have not seen a single film that came out this year and therefore can't say.

30. Which celebrity/public figure did you appreciate the most?
Joe Biden.

31. What did you want and not get?
I mean ... my dad to not die.

32. Any new fashion items for you?
I HAVE A GOORIN BRROTHERS HAT.

33. Food memories of 2016?
Answered this with the Hill Country question! Because I don't really care that much about eating, it's about the experience. Of course, we also did have the thing where we went out to eat for my birthday despite the fact I had a 103º fever. Then I called in sick to work the next day and was terrified they'd think I was hungover. I really did have a fever. I really did!

34. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
Oh, oops, helps to look at the next question, I guess. I turned twenty-eight and we went to Red Lobster but I was really sick. I worked until 4pm and nearly fainted at work twice, but there was no one to cover my shift so I kept just filling myself with meds from the in-house pharmacy and seeing patients and washing my hands CONSTANTLY. Then insisted on going out to dinner despite being half dead. Then went to sleep.

35. Who did you miss?
Last year's answer: My dad? Is this going to be my answer forever? Yes, it is.

36. Who was the best new person you met?
The co-worker whose name is the same as my dad's. He's a fantastic pleasure to work with. Also my advisor/CHSS professor of record.

37. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2016.
It's time to stop waiting for other people and just do it, whatever it is.

38. Where do you want to be next year at this time?
I have absolutely no idea. My life is an open series of question marks and I really don't like that and try not to think too hard about it. I do want to still be in my graduate program.

39. Did you enjoy this year?
No, but it was better than the year before. That's something.
gorramwolf: (wolfness)

[personal profile] gorramwolf 2017-01-01 07:14 am (UTC)(link)
<3! I hope the new year is a good one for you.
brainwane: A silhouette of a woman in a billowing trenchcoat, leaning against a pole (shadow)

[personal profile] brainwane 2017-01-03 01:13 pm (UTC)(link)
My deep condolences on a hard year. I hope 2017 is better for you.

I too love Hill Country (I like the food but also I delight in how unusual the experience is) and maybe I will see you there sometime!